What was it like for you when you were collared?

I am curious to hear your stories of what your experience was when you first received and accepted your collar.

Even in my dreams I’m submissive.

I had a sex dream last night. My Master was having sex with me. My Master was looking into my eyes and told me I wasn’t allowed to look away. He slid his fingers inside me but stopped before I came. My Master took his fingers out of my pussy and told me to touch myself while I licked them off. Master then asked me if I wanted to taste more of myself and I said “Yes my Master”. He slid his fingers back inside me and again told me to lick them off asking if I wanted more. Again I said “Yes please my Master”

This time, when my Master slid his fingers inside me he licked my lips and said he could taste my pussy on my mouth. My Master brought his hand up from my pussy and instead of me licking off his fingers my Master covered my nipples in my pussy juices and told me to lick them off and finger myself at the same time.

 

That was the whole dream. 💋👀🍑

What has shaped me into me.

 

 

I grew up in a very abusive home. Not only was I personally physically and mentally abused but I also watched my parents physically and mentally abused each other as well as my siblings to each other and received from both parents. I was also sexually abused for years. Not my parents and they never found out because I never told them.

 

Fast forward to now…

 

My past has molded me to a person who learns very quickly what is expected in order to not ever need punishment or correction. I personally thrive off of a positive reinforcement system and hope that I did not earn any punishments. Just knowing that I may have done something to disappoint my Master tears me apart.

 

After receiving my final grades for this semester I am looking forward to a possible reward. 3 B’s and 1 A! Summer classes start Saturday. Not that I feel entitled to anything for doing well, I was told I may get a reward.

 

What do you prefer? Positive reinforcement or punishment?

 

I have always been extremely emotional. In fact, I tend to internalize the emotions of others. It is difficult when my Master tells me to not let others bother me. Not something I can easily shut off. Not even sure I know how to.

 

I have an expectation of being confident. I also have a bunch of medical things going on that lead to anxiety and feelings of insecurity and frustration. I am not medicated so how do I shut that off to be what/who my Master wants me to be?

Slowly I am changing how I do things and being more mindful of what I do. It is certainly a challenge to relearn how to BE. I am learning, trying hard… feeling like I am not meeting expectations but my Master and I agreed that the transition will take some time.

Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

 

 

 

Where can I look for a 3rd…?

My master and I have been talking for a very very long time about having a threesome. I am all for adding another female to our fun. I really do not feel comfortable looking on Craigslist and with the exception of one friend of mine I do not know of anyone personally who would be interested. So how does one go about finding another woman?

We are not specifically active Within the community and really do not intend to become active at this point. Just looking for a few pointers and any advice on searching and weeding out the crazies to find somebody that is disease-free and not a stalker.

 

Thanks in advance for your help period it is much appreciated.